Working through Stigma
Many birth parents fear diagnosis because of the stigma and shame associated with FASD. It is the bravery and strength of the first birth parents in Elsipogtog who led the way because of their great love of their children—wanting them to succeed and get support and help. And succeed many of them did. Some of the same children who were suspended and in trouble constantly before diagnosis and intervention finished HS and are now working and married with their own children. The stigma has started to disappear in the community and we have started to have parents refer their children and older youth refer themselves. Below one of our first birth mothers who went through the diagnostic process with her child talks about her experience.
When she was a baby I didn’t understand why she would you know when she would get angry she would bang her head on the floor…..like constantly…..she didn’t know how to say how she was feeling…so just for…for not to get hurt I would put my hand on her head, where she was pounding her head, and so she wouldn’t get hurt……At first I dreaded going and didn’t know….didn’t want to know….but I put all those feelings aside and I said this is for her…… She asked me a lot of questions and I just answered them in my honest way as best as I could…what I know…but she helped me figure out a lot of stuff in my head…about it…just talking to her it was a relief….for me…that it had a name….the doctor told me that this is what it is and then what they were going to do and every word he was saying after that…it was lifting my spirits and then things started going more easier after that and both of us…and she started to learn and when she first started reading a book I cried…I never thought she would read a book……and I was so happy…when she graduated high school----all that, because of that, the diagnosis, it made my life easier---Thank you Eastern Door….